edenfalling: headshot of a raccoon, looking left (raccoon)
Master List of Elizabeth Culmer's Fiction


General Disclaimer: These stories are based on characters and situations created and owned by other people and corporations. I make no money from this borrowing of intellectual property, and intend no copyright or trademark infringement.

Organization: This list is organized primarily by fandom; within each fandom, it's arranged first by associated story cycles and then by writing date. Word counts and writing dates are approximations.

Content/Warning Policy: 1) I am not consistent about warnings! I use them when I remember, for a few relatively broad categories of potentially problematic content, but if something is off-page, non-explicit, or generally backgrounded, I probably won't think to note it in the metadata. 2) The things I try to warn for are explicit sex, rape, murder, torture, cannibalism, incest, depression/suicide, familial dysfunction, and occasionally also societal dysfunction (aka dystopia). Sometimes I just slap a general content warning on all my fic for a given fandom and don't label each individual fic. I also don't generally warn for violence, unless the violence in a fic is dramatically out-of-step with the violence in its source canon. 3) I don't use any content rating system unless I'm posting to a site or community that requires or encourages ratings, because I find movie-style ratings counter-intuitive when applied to written fiction, and not particularly useful for anything other than denoting the presence of explicit sex, which I already note in the metadata.

Quality Rating System: I've marked my favorite stories with asterisks, on a scale of 1 to 4. The more asterisks, the more I like the story. This doesn't necessarily mean that stories without asterisks are bad, just that I don't like them as much. Also, I am not claiming to be an arbiter of taste; you may love stories I dislike, and vice versa. I am just providing a heads-up about the ones that I think are best written and/or most interesting.

Where To Read: What I post on my journal tends to be the equivalent of a beta draft. If I have cross-posted a story literally anywhere else (except Tumblr; fic content there is just a mirror of fic content here), read the version that isn't on my journal. Versions on AO3 are definitive. If there is no AO3 version, read the ff.net version. If there is no ff.net version, read the FictionAlley version (only applicable for HP fic). Failing that, read the journal version, because that's the only one there is.

Harry Potter Fanfiction

Naruto Fanfiction

Angel Sanctuary Fanfiction

Chronicles of Narnia Fanfiction

Homestuck Fanfiction

Minor Fandom Fanfiction
(currently includes BtVS/A:tS, Daredevil (MCU), The Dark Is Rising, FF7: Mercverse AU, Inception, and Star Trek: AOS)

Miscellaneous Fanfiction
(Currently includes: American Gods, An Ash-Blonde Witch, Arthurian Mythology, Batman, the Bible, the Black Jewels series, the Bourne trilogy, Captain America (MCU), Charlotte's Web, Code Geass, the Darkangel trilogy, Death Note, Discworld, Doctor Who, Enchanted Forest Chronicles, The Girl with the Silver Eyes, Glee, Gormenghast, Hamilton, Hexwood, The Homeward Bounders, Howl's Moving Castle, Labyrinth, Lord of the Rings, Lucifer, Mad Max: Fury Road, Merlin, the Oz books, Ranma 1/2, Rise of the Guardians, Sailor Moon, Saiyuki, Seaward, Shakespeare, White Collar, Wolf Hall, X-Men, and Yu-Gi-Oh!)

Crossover Fanfiction
(I do not cross-list crossovers and fusions under their component fandoms; this is the only place to find them. Currently includes: the Anita Blake series, ASoIaF, Avatar: The Last Airbender, the Black Jewels series, BtVS, Cardcaptor Sakura, Chronicles of Narnia, the Darkangel trilogy, The Dark Is Rising, Discworld, Doctor Who, Enchanted Forest Chronicles, Ender's Game, Gundam Wing, Harry Potter, Hikaru no Go, Homestuck, Inception, the Indiana Jones movies, Leverage, Lucifer, MCU (various), Merlin, Naruto, the Oz books, Stargate: SG-1, Star Trek: AOS, Vorkosigan Saga, Welcome to Night Vale, and a couple other things that only appear in memes rather than actual fic.)



These stories are all mine! *grin* I use the same warning policy and quality rating system as for my fanfiction.

All Original Fiction


And just for my own reference: my Cotton Candy Bingo cards, for Round One and Round Two.
edenfalling: headshot of a raccoon, looking left (raccoon)
[personal profile] marmota_b said: Can I claim "adventure/quest" and ask for more of Susan and Lucy's Interesting Times? Please? 'Susan only went to fetch a few jars of jam. Meanwhile, the daring Captain Lucy, aged nine, accompanied by her loyal crew of Otter pups, set sail to the Port of Pantry.' (2,550 words)

Note: The problem with this story is that in my head, Susan and Lucy's 'interesting times' are BIG adventure-type things -- shipwrecks! kidnapping by magical birds! surprising a group of invading soldiers! etc. -- not two people (and a group of young Otters) crashing into each other in the kitchen. So I tried to work up some big thing that the pantry chaos could lead into, and that kept turning into an irretrievable mood clash that made me flinch away from the story every time I went to add another hundred words.

(I do still intend to write the big thing I came up with, but without the comedy and incidental Otters. Also it will be about half story and half academic textbook, because reasons, and involve all four Pevensies instead of only Susan and Lucy.)

Anyway, the upshot is that I ditched the long 'interesting times' story as unworkable and instead wrote a small fic about a minor domestic accident and slightly differing interpretations of how to be a responsible queen. Which is probably what you wanted all along and I'm the one who tripped over myself and made a lot of unnecessary bother for three weeks. *wry*

Continuity notes: The weather problems Susan mentions are detailed in Dedication. Mrs. Grubbins is the castle healer who previously appeared in Liminality.

Responsibility )

This concludes the latest iteration of my mini-ficlet prompt meme, with a third bingo. :) (I still have six Cotton Candy Bingo squares to fill, so I may run this again, but not for a while. I have other things to work on first.)
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Aha! I have resolved my Hilarion-Lamion-Ion confusion!

Near the end of KoA, in the scene where Attolis ruins his bedroom after receiving news about Nahuseresh, he explicitly orders Cleon and Ion to come help him change while the other attendants clean up the mess. Both Lamion and Hilarion participate in the conversation after the king leaves, which means Ion must be a separate person rather than a nickname for either of them.

(That remains, of course, an incredibly trivial issue, but I like to have things clear. Next I want to see if I can turn the described geography of our three focus countries into any kind of coherent map...)
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I have now read The King of Attolia and A Conspiracy of Kings (and most of the extant Queen's Thief fic on AO3, as one does), and yes, this was a good choice. This is a good series. :)

I hear book five (and possibly also six?) may be released either this year or in 2017? I certainly hope so! I very badly want to see more of these characters, and also learn how their socio-political woes turn out. (Plus that volcano, which is a Chekhov's gun if I ever saw one.)

I think, of the four currently published volumes, The King of Attolia is my least favorite. Which is not to say that I disliked it, just that while I was convinced that spoilers, I guess? )

Eh, perhaps these things simply happen in stages.

On a much more trivial note, I am slightly perplexed by one issue of nomenclature: namely, I can't tell whether some of Attolis's attendants (Hilarion, Lamion, and Ion) are meant to be three separate characters or only two. I genuinely have NO IDEA if Ion is meant to be a nickname, and if so, for which of those longer names. I mean, nicknames exist in this setting! Gen has one! So does Dite! On the other hand, there's a character (Nomenus) in CoK who seems to have Ion as his actual full given name, which Sophos takes at face value and directly equates to Ion-the-attendant.

I was unable to find a scene in which Hilarion and/or Lamion directly addressed or thought about Ion, or vice versa, so I can't clear the confusion up that way.

Is there any fandom consensus on that issue?
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mutilated pepper seedling
the poor mutilated seedling

closeup of the damage
closeup of the crime

two pepper seedlings with stakes
its neighbors, now with protective stakes

twelve pepper seedlings in pots on a wooden porch
the pepper fleet, shifted north

When I looked out my kitchen window this morning, I discovered that the squirrels had been at it again. And this time, it's not reparable: they'd snapped the poor leftmost pepper seedling in half, below all of its leaves (and even below the cotyledons). I do not have high hopes for the stem recovering, though I have watered it on the off chance of a miracle.

I staked the other two peppers that have suffered the most depredations. I have also moved the entire flotilla of pots a couple feet to the north, away from the mulberry tree. This means they will get less shade, but hopefully there will also be fewer fallen berries to tempt squirrels past the barrier of repellent spray.

Fucking squirrels.

(I have to say, though, that this particular spray is pretty shitty. Last year I used an Ortho brand product, which is probably full of poisons but smelled kind of sweetish before fading out of human detection and also worked reasonably well until autumn when the need to bulk up for winter overrode the squirrels' general revulsion. This year I'm stuck with Bonide Repels-All, and not only is it failing to repel squirrels, it reeks to high heaven of garlic and rotten eggs, and the stench lingers so strongly that it's stinking up my entire gardening cupboard. Yecch. Unfortunately Lowes and Agway didn't have any Ortho products, and getting to Home Depot is not logistically feasible without a car. *sigh*)

[[original Tumblr post, for when the embedded images inevitably break]]
edenfalling: stylized black-and-white line art of a sunset over water (Default)
thirteen pepper sprouts outdoors on a wooden porch
thirteen pepper seedlings, Monday, 20 June 2016

three pepper sprouts, two in a plastic windowbox and one in a terracotta pot
the three that have suffered from squirrels

My lovely little peppers have been doing well out on my back porch, aside from the three that have been knocked over by squirrels -- three times in the case of the poor lefthand seedling in the leftmost windowbox. I have been keeping a close enough eye on the situation that I was able to right the victims every time, and I have since built them little dirt buttresses and filled in the resulting hollows with more potting soil.

I may yet need to resort to stakes. :/

This has been an unusually dry and sunny June, so I've been watering the peppers every couple-three days. I also continue to tidy them every day, because mulberry trees shed like motherfuckers, and they shed even worse when squirrels are actively jumping from limb to limb and eating the berries. I mean, they shed fewer berries! That's very nice. But they make up for it by shedding stupid amounts of twigs and leaves. Squirrels are not tidy eaters.

Never plant a mulberry tree near your house. This is a bit of life advice I am imparting to you, and which I wish Landlord Dude had taken into account lo these many years ago when he decided that right slap against the piling of my porch was a brilliant place for a white mulberry tree. (Spoiler: HE WAS WRONG.)

[[original Tumblr post, for when the embedded images inevitably break]]
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I mentioned back in March that my sister has started writing original Kindle ebook m/m romance and erotica. I haven't talked further about it because she wanted to feel more confident in her writing and business model before she let me advertise anything, which is still the case.

But! I can tell you that I have finally read one of her stories -- because I just spent the last couple days editing her latest work -- and it's pretty good if you like that sort of thing. I mean, original gay erotica is not my area of interest so I cannot really speak for the hotness or lack thereof of the sex scenes, but the characters are likeable, there's an actual plot to go along with the romance and porn, and the porn itself didn't make me run screaming, so. >:D

(My one caveat is that she belongs to the camp who use 'cum' instead of 'come' -- dishonor on her! dishonor on her cow! -- but eh, nobody's perfect.)
edenfalling: stylized black-and-white line art of a sunset over water (Default)
There are a lot of books that I sort of vaguely intend to read at some point. Like, A LOT a lot. Most of them I never do get around to, because other things come up and a vague intention is easily forgotten or set aside, but now and then I do actually make good on things.

Which is a long way of saying that I checked out Megan Whalen Turner's The Thief and The Queen of Attolia yesterday (sadly, my local library does not own the next two books), took them home in the evening, and made the terrible life choice to start reading them at 10pm.


I put hold requests on The King of Attolia and A Conspiracy of Kings this afternoon. Hopefully they will arrive on Friday.

*attempts not to die of anticipation*
edenfalling: stylized black-and-white line art of a sunset over water (Default)
thirteen pepper sprouts outdoors on a wooden porch

I forgot to post this yesterday, whoops!

Anyway, these are my peppers enjoying the great outdoors. I was able to leave them out overnight from Saturday to Sunday, but then I had to resume bringing them in again because we are having unseasonably cold nights. Last night the temperature dropped into the upper 40s again! (Fahrenheit. Which would be, I think, 8 or 9 Celsius.)

I will have to bring them in again tonight, but I think after that the weather will be less ridiculous and they will have become tough enough to leave out indefinitely.

I have already had to pick out one mulberry sprout, in addition to fishing out and throwing away over two dozen green and unripe mulberries and a bunch of mulberry leaves and twigs. I hate the mulberry tree. I hate it passionately.

[[original Tumblr post, for when the embedded images inevitably break]]


And now I am going to get lunch, since I meant to do that an hour and a half ago and my stomach is most unpleased with me at the moment. *wry*
edenfalling: golden flaming chalice in a double circle (gold chalice)
My church (fellowship, congregation, whatever) holds an annual picnic every June. I have never attended. This is because it's at Stewart Park on the edge of town, I have no car, and the #13 bus very unhelpfully does not run on Sundays.

I mean, technically I could walk -- I do live on the north side of town so it's not completely unfeasible -- but until recently the only route I knew was annoyingly indirect and also lacked sidewalks for a not insignificant portion of the distance.

But! While dogsitting this May, I discovered a nifty back route into the Renwick Wildwood Bird Sanctuary, which is on the correct side of the highway and railroad tracks and right next door to Stewart Park (and also, you know, a woodland and therefore nicely shaded instead of a baking hot side-of-the-highway hellscape) so I think this year I could actually attend! I have baked and packed brownies in preparation! I have packed a plate, a cup, and some plastic silverware as directed! I have looked up where the Large Pavilion even is! I am ready for this!


I really do not want to go to sleep right now, but if I don't, I will never get up early enough in the morning. *headdesk*


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Elizabeth Culmer

June 2016

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