[Fic] "How Team Seven Got Their Summon Animals" -- Naruto

This is a request ficlet for anonymous, in response to the prompt: something involving Team 7, a D-rank mission gone horribly wrong, and the phrase 'exploding frogs'.

I couldn't get anywhere with this one until it occurred to me to try my hand at literary pastiche. I owe sincere apologies to Rudyard Kipling and his Just So Stories, which I have shamelessly imitated. (Seriously. I even included two verses of doggerel at the end, for stylistic verisimilitude.)

This is absolutely not canon at all. It is complete and utter crack. (ff.net version)

( How Team Seven Got Their Summon Animals )

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...You know, that particular narrative voice is harder than it looks!