wherein Liz feels untethered
Jan. 10th, 2019 10:39 amI've been having an issue this past week where I wake up about 1 hour and 15 minutes before my alarm. If I wake up fully, I then can't get properly back to sleep and only fitfully doze until my alarm, thus losing an hour of good sleep. If I don't fully wake up, I get properly back to sleep... but then my alarm goes off when I'm in a deep part of my sleep cycle and getting up is like wading through cold molasses.
(This is annoying, since my previous pattern has been to wake up once during the night about 3-5 hours after falling asleep and thus 3-5 hours before my alarm, which is a much more convenient break point. I don't know what's caused the change. Possibly I can fix it by going to bed a little earlier?)
Anyway, possibly as a result of my extreme morning grogginess, I am now feeling very floaty-dissociated -- like, I'm aware that I have a body, and my body and brain are doing stuff (yay work?), but I'm just sort of riding along as an observer instead of being the body and doing the work. On days when I don't have to be anywhere, I'm cool with this sort of thing -- it can be very meditative, actually -- but it's inconvenient on days when I'm supposed to be a functional human being interacting with other human beings.
*sigh*
Well, I will keep on remote-piloting myself for now, and sooner or later I will click back together.
(This is annoying, since my previous pattern has been to wake up once during the night about 3-5 hours after falling asleep and thus 3-5 hours before my alarm, which is a much more convenient break point. I don't know what's caused the change. Possibly I can fix it by going to bed a little earlier?)
Anyway, possibly as a result of my extreme morning grogginess, I am now feeling very floaty-dissociated -- like, I'm aware that I have a body, and my body and brain are doing stuff (yay work?), but I'm just sort of riding along as an observer instead of being the body and doing the work. On days when I don't have to be anywhere, I'm cool with this sort of thing -- it can be very meditative, actually -- but it's inconvenient on days when I'm supposed to be a functional human being interacting with other human beings.
*sigh*
Well, I will keep on remote-piloting myself for now, and sooner or later I will click back together.