edenfalling | burn the sickness out

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I continued to feel gross today, so I have decided Not to bake snickerdoodles for the memorial service tomorrow. Instead I will apologetically drop off three boxes of Thin Mints, because A) more sanitary and B) who doesn't like Girl Scout cookies?

I did an apartment tour this afternoon, whereupon my body smacked me in the metaphorical face and waved a "Stop exerting yourself; you have no energy reserves!!" banner until I was back at my desk and could spend a couple minutes just breathing and existing. I hate that part of being ill.

Tonight's tax prep appointment turned out to be real -- we were unsure because the client had been going to a Not the IRS office in another NY county for several years, but they moved to Ithaca in 2023 and did actually want an Ithaca-based tax preparer. So that worked out nicely.

Now I am going to faff about online until 9pm, at which point I intend to take a nice hot shower (for decongestion and relaxation purposes) and then fall into bed.

...

I have a litany I sometimes repeat in the shower when I have a nasty upper respiratory infection. It must be spoken only when the water is set very hot, almost to the point where I can't tolerate it anymore and periodically need to pull the shower curtain aside and gulp cooler air. It goes, "Mother oh mother oh mother of mine, wash me cleaner than clean. Scour me purer than pure. Burn the sickness out. Burn the sickness out. Burn the sickness out." Repeat as needed.

I am fairly sure there are some residual cultural Christian influences floating around in those words, but mostly it reflects a desire to sluice away all the gooey unpleasantness of being ill (why is producing floods and swamps of mucus the human body's go-to immune response? WHY???) and temporarily induce a sort of floaty no-mind state where I stop caring that I am sore and tired and full of snot.

Seeing that I am currently sore and tired and full of snot, I may invoke that litany tonight.

Current Mood: sick
Current Location: ithaca, ny

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Elizabeth Culmer

June 2025

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