![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
So, having told this story to my Sunday school class, my coworkers, my friend Susan, and my family, I am now going to tell the internet:
At about 7:00am this morning, I was awakened by a 1.5 inch (approx. 4cm) wolf spider RUNNING ACROSS MY FACE.
I jumped out of bed and blinked and grabbed for my glasses and tried to figure out where it had gone and whether it was going to hit the floor and run across my feet and did I have anything with which to cover my hand when I killed it or was I going to get spider guts all over my skin.
It had stopped on the side of my pillow. I grabbed a tissue, moved into position... and then realized that A) the spider wasn't moving, and B) if I killed it, I'd get spider guts all over my new clean pillowcase. And I had a heavy glass and a sheet of paper just in the next room, so...
I trapped it. Then I left it to sit on my nightstand for a couple minutes while I calmed down -- adrenaline is great in the moment, but not so much once the crisis has passed -- after which I carried it downstairs and threw it into the front garden.
And then I went back to bed.
This was not particularly successful. For the next two hours, every time a breath of air moved across my face, or my hair shifted against my skin, my hindbrain shouted "SPIDER, SPIDER, SPIDER!!!" and I jolted back out of my uneasy doze.
...
Also, I kept having muddled dreams about an airplane that somehow crash-landed on an alien planet where the native creatures were made up of prion-like proteins, and some of the aliens were intelligent and sort of absorbed a few passengers and wanted to go back to Earth in disguise. The remaining humans figured out a way to scan for imposters, and finally got the plane to take off, but once they got back home they realized that some spores or something had gotten into their air supply, and they started turning all proteins on earth into this flaky, sloughing mass of yuck -- you'd start to eat a steak, for example, and it would dissolve like sheets of mushy snakeskin. And soon the whole world was on the verge of being converted...
Which is, granted, a dream that one wants to wake up from, but not if waking involves a flash of blind panic over being attacked by giant spiders.
*sigh*
At about 7:00am this morning, I was awakened by a 1.5 inch (approx. 4cm) wolf spider RUNNING ACROSS MY FACE.
I jumped out of bed and blinked and grabbed for my glasses and tried to figure out where it had gone and whether it was going to hit the floor and run across my feet and did I have anything with which to cover my hand when I killed it or was I going to get spider guts all over my skin.
It had stopped on the side of my pillow. I grabbed a tissue, moved into position... and then realized that A) the spider wasn't moving, and B) if I killed it, I'd get spider guts all over my new clean pillowcase. And I had a heavy glass and a sheet of paper just in the next room, so...
I trapped it. Then I left it to sit on my nightstand for a couple minutes while I calmed down -- adrenaline is great in the moment, but not so much once the crisis has passed -- after which I carried it downstairs and threw it into the front garden.
And then I went back to bed.
This was not particularly successful. For the next two hours, every time a breath of air moved across my face, or my hair shifted against my skin, my hindbrain shouted "SPIDER, SPIDER, SPIDER!!!" and I jolted back out of my uneasy doze.
...
Also, I kept having muddled dreams about an airplane that somehow crash-landed on an alien planet where the native creatures were made up of prion-like proteins, and some of the aliens were intelligent and sort of absorbed a few passengers and wanted to go back to Earth in disguise. The remaining humans figured out a way to scan for imposters, and finally got the plane to take off, but once they got back home they realized that some spores or something had gotten into their air supply, and they started turning all proteins on earth into this flaky, sloughing mass of yuck -- you'd start to eat a steak, for example, and it would dissolve like sheets of mushy snakeskin. And soon the whole world was on the verge of being converted...
Which is, granted, a dream that one wants to wake up from, but not if waking involves a flash of blind panic over being attacked by giant spiders.
*sigh*
