wherein Liz inflicts stream-of-consciousness rambling upon the internet at large

[edenfalling]

I thought I was out of the blue funk for a while, but that turns out to have been kind of a temporary "whee, Homestuck!!!" high and I have been back to gray and washed-out for a few days. :-( But I did get nine hours of sleep last night so I was able to have lunch on my lunch break instead of taking a half hour nap like I've been doing the past week (my life choices, seriously, they need work), which is always a good sign.

Anyway. Change of topic.

So the NY Giants won the Super Bowl!!!

I am only a desultory football fan, but inasmuch as I have a team, the Giants are it. It was kind of fate, you know? I am from northern New Jersey and the Jets are pretentious annoying showboats (don't look at me like that, I am allowed to talk trash, this is football), so the Giants were the obvious local team of my heart, and even though I currently live closer to Buffalo, pffft, no, I will become a Bills fan approximately half past NEVER. (No matter how many stupid Bills-related memoirs and photobooks we end up selling at the smoke shop for local interest value, seriously, eesh.)

I wanted to watch the game. We closed the smoke shop early and everything (because there is no point being open when everybody else is watching the game!) but by the time I got home, what I was able to find first was one of those sites that updates with written information about every play, and the Giants were up 9-0 and...

Sports are one of the few things I am massively superstitious about, okay? I know it's ridiculous but I can't help myself. And I thought, "Oh shit, now I can't try to find actual streaming video, because if I start watching the game instead of just these play-by-play updates, clearly the magic will go away and the Giants will lose."

Completely irrational, I know.

But hey, it worked, didn't it? *grin*

Now I am going to bed so as to hopefully get another nine hours of sleep and continue wrenching my life back onto a semi-rational schedule. It would be nice if I could get there by Friday, when my parents come visit for my birthday.

(I am going to be 30, jesus fuck WHAT.)

...

Right. Sleep.

Comments

[rthstewart]

Happy early birthday! 30 isn't so bad, as one who is WAAAY beyond it.

[edenfalling]

Thank you! I have a feeling I am going to freak out a LOT more in three years, when my little sister turns 30. Her birthdays always make me feel ten times older than my own ever manage to do. *wry*

[rthstewart]

And I hope you pull out of the funk! Sleep! sunshine! companionship! Get help if you need it, OK?

[edenfalling]

Sleep is delicious. :-)

[autumnia]

I'm not a football fan at all but when your team is in the game, you still have to root for them regardless. (Especially when the opponent is one of your city's biggest rivals.)

That said, I'll be glad for all the hoopla to die down after the parade and rallies today. All the Giants coverage have practically taken over the local (and part of the) news broadcasts. And even if you didn't watch the game, you can still watch the parade -- the local news stations (I think the CW, NBC and FOX) are all planning to stream the ticker-tape parade this morning starting at 11am.

[autumnia]

Whoops. Meant to say the news stations are streaming the parade online (one even said streaming to mobile too), so if you want links to that, I can pass those on to you as well. :-)

[edenfalling]

(Especially when the opponent is one of your city's biggest rivals.)

Ha, yeah. Of course, that particular rivalry applies more to being a Yankees and/or a Jets fan (neither of which is applicable in my case), but even so. :-)

[branchandroot]

*entertained* Whatever works.

Congratulations on 30! I will be 40 this fall, and yeah, there's all those moments of boggling. How did I get here? What have I been doing all this time? You mean I'm supposed to be a /grown-up/?

[edenfalling]

It's not that I am unhappy with my life. I mean, I have a job! I have an apartment! I have time to read and write! I am semi-involved with my local UU congregation to help fulfil my religious needs! Etcetera. But yeah, there are days when I look around and it's like, what happened to me between the ages of 18 and 25 that THIS is where I ended up? I am not sure exactly what I was expecting from adulthood, but working as a clerk in a small local magazine/tobacco/random-other-stuff store was definitely not on the list. *wry*

[annearchy.livejournal.com]

Congrats on the Giants' victory:) And in case I'm not online (?!) on Friday, a very early HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D

[edenfalling]

Thank you!

[vehrec.livejournal.com]

I'm going to be 26 this year, and I know how you feel-I shouldn't be this old! I feel like 22, 23 tops. A 26 year old should be on his way up the ziggurat, lickity split, etc. Instead, here I am, struggling to find work that isn't my cousin's meat-packing plant.

Some days, I feel like there's something wrong with my generation, and others I feel like it's every other generation that has been wrong. Whatever the case, I'm not feeling too good about it.

[edenfalling]

My mental/emotional image of myself has been aging, but somewhere around 22 it disconnected from my physical age and started changing a LOT more slowly. I am going to be 30, but I still reflexively think of myself as, oh, 24-25ish. I think this happens to most people, perhaps unless they have children.

Good luck with your job hunting!

[cherokee1.livejournal.com]

Happy Birthday early!
And yeah, the birthday thing.
So strange to realize I am almost 50. godhelpme.
doing the nap thing is normal for those of us who
live with depression.
It takes so much energy to get
through the day when you deal with the public.
I turn off the lights in my classroom during my planning period and
put up my feet for 15 minutes.
What is up with the depressed people doing public service anyway?
good thing, I wouldn't leave my house ever if I did not have to, and
jeeze, ain't that healthy.
I think once we had a comment convo about your college experience, and
I did not respond to your tale, but what you went through was extremely similar
to my own.
it sounds as though you were smarter and more mature about your decisions
and choices than I was.
I crashed and burned spectacularly, not
wanting to "fail" and failing real hard.
I spent several years simply climbing back to subpar.
Anyway, glad your team won, magical thinking is
a wonderful talent.
C

[edenfalling]

I like dealing with people -- it is necessary for emotional health, among other things, and I do genuinely like people -- but eesh, it is EXHAUSTING. For me, that's an introversion thing as well as a periodic depression thing. And it's one reason I have my current job, which forces me to get out of the house and interact with people all day long. Otherwise I would be a miserable hermit, and that's no good for anyone.

Magical thinking is not how I would run the majority of my life, but it's fun for small, carefully cordoned-off areas, like sports fandom. :-)