wherein Liz is annoyed and cannot directly argue with the source of her irritation

[edenfalling]

Over the last couple days, an anonymous reader has been going through The Way of the Apartment Manager and The Guardian in Spite of Herself leaving a series of, shall we say, interesting reviews. This person either does not have or is not using an ff.net account, and also has not used a nickname or any other identifier; nonetheless, I am pretty sure all the following reviews come from the same anonymouse.

Since I have no way to respond directly, I'm going to post the reviews and my commentary here. (Look, I have never claimed not to be horribly petty at heart. *wry*)

~~~~~

Chapter: 3 ("The Way of the Apartment Manager")
From: Guest
-------------------

:The Sharingan doesn't help the user spot someone who's hiding or out of
eyesight. That's not one of the abilities of the Sharingan. The Byakugan does,
but not the Sharingan.

-------------------

So far as I can tell, this is in response to the following passage:

"This is a nice area," Iruka said as he looked around the yard. "Do you get much incidental damage from being so near the village wall?"

"Not really -- even when we were at war, this part of the wall is sheltered by the outcropping over there, so most attacks came in other areas."

Naga cast an appraising glance at the stones looming beyond the massive wooden wall. "Looks like a good place to set up long-range weapons."

Yukiko grinned. "You'd think so, from here, but the other sides are mostly a sheer cliff, and what idiot is going to climb up this side of the rock with all our ninja ready to shoot at him? Especially since we have the Hyuuga and the Uchiha so we're sure to spot them."

It's been years, but I am pretty sure I meant that the Uchiha would be able to see through any genjutsu that atttackers might use to disguise themselves while otherwise in plain view on the cliff, not that the Uchiha could miraculously see through the wall.

I am also pretty sure that this would be obvious to anyone who isn't actively looking for points on which to attack me.

~~~~~

Chapter: 5
From: Guest
-------------------

:I usually hate and completely skip over stories that have original characters
as main characters/self-insert fics (I came here for NARUTO fanfiction
dammit!). They annoy the HELL out of me, but this story's okay! It's also very
well written! (:

-------------------

In light of the other reviews, I think this is mostly a "but if I throw in a compliment, you can't complain about my other behavior!" ass-cover. Especially since this is the ONLY review that actually says ANYTHING about the story itself.

~~~~~

Chapter: 6
From: Guest
-------------------

:Itachi graduated early because he's fu*king awsome! NOT because of his clan.
He's a genius and a prodigy! Don't reduce his skills to just being the
influence of his clan. If that were the case then why did no one else graduate
early huh? No matter how "prestigious" they are, the can't magically create
prodigious skills. Do you think Itachi rose through the ranks and got into
ANBU by using the Uchiha clan's influence? You have to have real skills to
accomplish what Itachi did! Don't insult him!

-------------------

And we discover that "Guest" is a rabid Itachi-fan who thinks he can do no wrong and probably cured cancer in his spare time. (This will come back later; just wait.) Also, please note that this tirade is not even in response to the chapter. It is a response to an author's note:

AN: systemman questioned the timing of Naruto's entrance to the ninja academy, given that he managed to fail the graduation exam three times before he finally passed. I can only come up with three explanations. 1) He entered the academy early. 2) He got overconfident and tried to take the exam before he was ready. 3) Various teachers didn't want to deal with him and pushed him into taking the exams, hoping to either get rid of him or discourage him from being a ninja.

Explanation 1 seems a bit implausible, since Naruto isn't a genius and the only early graduates we know of so far were Kakashi and Itachi, both of whom are definitely exceptional. (Also, one graduated during wartime when Konoha needed extra bodies on the front lines, and the other probably had a very influential clan leaning on the Third Hokage to bend the rules.) And I doubt the people of Konoha were enthusiastic about letting the Kyuubi's vessel learn new ways to potentially kill them.

Therefore, I'm inclined to go with explanations 2 and 3, which mean that it's perfectly reasonable for Naruto not to be in the academy during this story. +grin+

I said, explicitly, that Itachi was "definitely exceptional." How this translates to me "reduc[ing] his skills to just being the influence of his clan" is beyond me. I am also baffled by the assertion that no one else graduated early, since I specifically mentioned Kakashi in the same sentence as Itachi. *headdesk*

Furthermore, I am of the opinion that early graduation is a nightmare scenario that nobody in their right mind would want for a child -- how is sending a six- or seven-year-old kid into a war zone or on an assassination mission in any way a good or desirable thing??? But apparently Itachi is so "fucking awesome" that any trauma would just roll off him with no effect. How silly of me to think otherwise, and to think that the adults of Konoha might generally want to wait a few years before introducing their children to the harsh realities of ninja life. (For one thing, I suspect early graduation leads to mental problems -- neither Kakashi nor Itachi is what I'd call a well adjusted person -- and most commanders probably prefer slightly more stable soldiers.)

So I think early graduation is only an option in unusual circumstances, no matter how skilled the child in question. It has nothing to do with thinking Itachi isn't skilled enough. It has to do with questioning his father's parenting skills and his clan's overall priorities.

Argh.

~~~~~

Chapter: 13
From: Guest
-------------------

:Gaara's seal didn't turn him into a killer, it just made him a little
mentally unstable. The people around him who treated him like trash, the
assassination attempts, and the lack of love in his life turned him into a
killer.

-------------------

Again, this is a response to an author's note rather than, you know, the story. *sigh* Here is the note section in question:

3) Ninja aren't prejudiced idiots, but you have to remember that Naruto's seal isn't something they have much familiarity with, and other seals used to create jinchuuriki (like Gaara) obviously have some flaws... like, oh, say, turning children into sociopathic killers. :-) And they're also used to judging people by their families and bloodlines, so it's not terribly surprising that they're a bit suspicious of Naga.

I was a bit flippant and imprecise here -- it's true that Gaara's social situation is heavily implicated in his mental issues -- but I am pretty sure that the ease with which Shukaku could communicate with him and take him over didn't help. In that particular respect, Naruto's seal (which locked Kyuubi away much more thoroughly) was a lot safer for both the kid in question and the people around him. (Also, remember that I wrote this story back in 2004-2005, when we hardly knew anything about jinchuuriki and their seals.)

~~~~~

Chapter: 1 ("The Guardian in Spite of Herself")
From: Guest
-------------------

:The only thing I don't like is how you're potraying Itachi. I know he played
the part of the villain until the truth all came out, and you probably didn't
know back when you wrote this... but still. I don't like it. Itachi isn't
arrogant like the rest of the clan either. It's just... you're portraying
Itachi as this horrible person, and he's not! It just bothers me.

-------------------

Like I said, an Itachi apologist.

Look. Even if Itachi was a good guy all along, he had to play the role of a bad guy in order to infiltrate Akatsuki. That means he had to do horrible things; you can't just wave a magic wand and say that he didn't do them. Even if it was for a good end, he still killed a LOT of people. (We will not even get into the shit he did to Sasuke later on -- I can kind of handwave that as Itachi breaking under the strain of prolonged undercover work, but it's not relevant here since none of that has happened during "Guardian" and may not happen in the future as changes spiral outward.)

So why "Guest" thinks I should portray Itachi as sweetness and light -- particularly from the POVs of people who have no reason to know about his hidden motives -- is frankly beyond me.

~~~~~

Chapter: 15
From: Guest
-------------------

:If you start a story then you should finish it.

-------------------

...

Yeah, I'll just let that one speak for itself.

~~~~~

Okay, I feel better now. Back to work on the "Secrets" epilogue, which is now at 2,125 words and hopefully winding down to a conclusion! *crosses fingers*

(P.S. Oh, also, happy 4th of July!!! *sets off virtual fireworks*)

Comments

[redwolf]

Ah, the Pit of Voles brings amusement and stupid again.

You're not going to bother reading the story because it doesn't address your favourite character, but you're going to wank and self-censor yourself while you write a flaming rant about an author's note? Somewhere a bus is missing the idiot who sits up the back and licks the window.

[edenfalling]

In fairness, the censorship bit may be done by ff.net directly and/or done to get around nannybot software -- I know ff.net strips URLs and similar things out of stories and private messages, so perhaps they also strip certain common curses.

I am really not sure what the "reviews" are meant to accomplish. I mean, if the anonymouse wants to talk to me about these issues, leaving some form of contact information would seem to be helpful, yes? *headdesk* The particularly weird bit about the Itachi rants is that Itachi is not even in "The Way of the Apartment Manager," aside from a tiny one-scene cameo when Yukiko and Naruto stand behind him, Sasuke, and their parents in line to buy some snacks. And in "The Guardian in Spite of Herself," he has mostly been a McGuffin -- his actions are the trigger for a bunch of the plot, but so far he's only been on-page for two scenes in 15 chapters.

[(Anonymous)]

*headdesk* Gotta love this grade of idiot. Hey, at least s/he isn't threatening to have it taken down for imaginary rule-violation!

[edenfalling]

This is true! Small favors, I guess. *wry*

[rahirah]

I know nothing about Naruto except what I've seen on anon memes, but that has convinced me that 90% of its fandom is a little, er, over-committed to their favorites.

[edenfalling]

Yeah, there is definitely a tendency toward the "My favorite character is perfect and can do no wrong and anything that looks like he/she did something bad is clearly the fault of that bastard/that bitch/those jealous idiots/etcetera" style of canon interpretation. :-(

This gets particularly strong with regard to Itachi, who was kind of hastily and awkwardly retconned into having been a secret good guy all along... but only after he'd done a bunch of gratuitously nasty stuff that doesn't make sense under that reinterpretation. But he's a pretty boy and also the "better" older brother of a highly divisive main character (Sasuke), so yeah. *sigh* He has the inevitable rabid fandom posse. He had them even when he was still canonically evil -- there were people who would argue, in all seriousness, that Itachi was a good guy and the little brother whom he canonically tortured had somehow driven him to evil -- and the retcon just made things weirder.

[askerian]

wow uh. no. :/ what an idiot.

[edenfalling]

I am grateful that my annoying reviews are mostly of the "what an idiot" persuasion rather than gratuitously nasty attacks, but it's very frustrating to find someone who has the time and the spoons to actually write a comment... that has nothing to do with my actual story. Argh. :-(

[askerian]

yeah, it's pretty much like they LIED to you, look you get a review!! omg yay!! and no, it's some preachy off-topic ramble that more often than not is factually wrong or distasteful somehow in how it reads the characters. Ffff. Go spam someone else's inbox okay >__>

[akatsuki210.livejournal.com]

IMO, reviews like that are even more annoying when they're from someone anonymous.

So I think early graduation is only an option in unusual circumstances, no matter how skilled the child in question. It has nothing to do with thinking Itachi isn't skilled enough. It has to do with questioning his father's parenting skills and his clan's overall priorities.

I've always wondered whether Itachi and/or Kakashi graduated so early because of wars that were going on at the time. The war with Iwa might have already started when Kakashi graduated, and based on Hinata's apparent age during the attempted kidnap scene, it seems like the peace with Cloud happened pre-Massacre. Maybe Konoha was so desperate for exceptional soldiers that Kakashi and Itachi were graduated long before they'd normally be allowed to even with their outstanding abilities.

Look. Even if Itachi was a good guy all along, he had to play the role of a bad guy in order to infiltrate Akatsuki. That means he had to do horrible things; you can't just wave a magic wand and say that he didn't do them. Even if it was for a good end, he still killed a LOT of people. (We will not even get into the shit he did to Sasuke later on -- I can kind of handwave that as Itachi breaking under the strain of prolonged undercover work, but it's not relevant here since none of that has happened during "Guardian" and may not happen in the future as changes spiral outward.)

I've always thought it would be interesting to see a story that covered Itachi's time in Akatsuki, particularly in the early years (perhaps when Ame's civil war was still going on). I've poked at the idea a little in a couple of my fics, and there's one in particular that deals with the psychological effects of having to go along with all the stuff that the other Akatsuki members do. I especially wonder about how Itachi would have reacted to the civil war in Ame and Pain's eventual coup--would he have seen all the destruction and had his belief that he made the right (or at least less-wrong) choice by preventing something similar from happening to Konoha, or would he have seen the original "good" Akatsuki triumphing and been like "Oh fuck, even if this whole civil war thing is awful it can sometimes bring about positive change, what have I done?"

[edenfalling]

I've always wondered whether Itachi and/or Kakashi graduated so early because of wars that were going on at the time. The war with Iwa might have already started when Kakashi graduated, and based on Hinata's apparent age during the attempted kidnap scene, it seems like the peace with Cloud happened pre-Massacre. Maybe Konoha was so desperate for exceptional soldiers that Kakashi and Itachi were graduated long before they'd normally be allowed to even with their outstanding abilities.

Yeah, that was pretty much my analysis, though in Itachi's case I think Fugaku's desire to turn Itachi into a sort of perfect example for his clan to live up to and all other clans to envy might also have come into play

You should write that Itachi story! It would be fascinating!