a poll, because I am curious

[edenfalling]

Tangentially to my last post, because I know people react differently to things:

Poll #13121

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 20

View Respondents

Upon receiving a review of the form, "I usually dislike/hate/don't understand/can't believe in Story Element X, but you made me like it/understand it/see how it could work/enjoy your story anyway," how do you tend to feel?

View Answers

Flattered: "I'm such a great writer that I changed this reader's mind about X!"
15 (75.0%)

Defensive: "What's wrong with X anyway?!"
3 (15.0%)

Confused: "If you don't like X, why were you reading my story in the first place?"
10 (50.0%)

Something else which I will explain in a comment.
3 (15.0%)

Tickybox!
7 (35.0%)

(The poll is Dreamwidth only, since that's where I have a paid account, but I think you may also be able to vote via OpenID.)

Comments

[wrabbit]

I think it's great. It's not confusing to me why someone would read something they don't normally go for: I read outside of my comfort zone all the time because I crave the feeling of my mental kaleidoscope shifting into a view I've never experienced before that I get when a story makes me look at something in a different way and like something I didn't like. Kinks that I have always previously found to be turn-offs, pairings I have never understood, plots I have never liked but always wanted to see done in a convincing way anyway. Anything like that.

There are certainly "I've never liked this, but..." comments that are phrased in an offensive or kink-shaming way. But in my experience most of them mean to say (and I mean to say when I write them) nothing more than 'YKINMK(BYKIO), and I was resigned to never getting what other people saw in it, but I now I see something I never understood in a new way and even positively connected with it all because of how you compellingly communicated its attractiveness in a way that I could connect with in this story.' And that's fantastic.

[edenfalling]

But in my experience most of them mean to say (and I mean to say when I write them) nothing more than 'YKINMK(BYKIO), and I was resigned to never getting what other people saw in it, but I now I see something I never understood in a new way and even positively connected with it all because of how you compellingly communicated its attractiveness in a way that I could connect with in this story.' And that's fantastic.

See, that is a response I would be uncomplicatedly flattered to receive! The trouble (for me) is that in my experience, too many people who have used the "I don't usually like X, but..." construction when commenting on my stories have written with an undertone of "and I still don't like X and would've enjoyed the story more if you hadn't included it" instead of "and now I can see why other people enjoy X and thus my horizons have been broadened." Which I think has made me reflexively suspicious of that construction, no matter what the reviewer's actual intent. :-(

[wrabbit]

I haven't seen many comments like that myself. That is disappointing.

Whether I would take "I still don't like X" comments as rude or awkwardly well-meaning depends on the phrasing - whether the reviewer is just acknowledging a difference in taste in the process of issuing a compliment or whether they are critiquing the author as having the wrong taste and implying they should change it.

If they write, "I don't like X, but I gave your story a chance and really liked it despite not being into X," that doesn't necessarily imply the author is misguided for liking X even though the reviewer doesn't like it. If really they don't like X personally and still don't like it after reading the story, it's got to have been an exceptional story in other aspects for them to push past the personal barrier of not liking whatever X is. I would most likely not make a comment like this because like domarzione wrote below, it can have the unfortunate implication that I don't like the rest of their work. I would take a comment like this as a compliment as long as it seemed they were just saying YKINMK and not explicitly putting down X as distasteful or always written badly, but I can see how someone wouldn't or how it could be read either way.

But if they write something to the effect of, "I don't usually like X, but this was good. It would have been sexier/better without the X." Then X isn't being pointed out as a neutral thing to be liked or disliked, and it's not being pointed out as a means to compliment, but the author's preference for X is actually being critiqued as wrong. That I would find rude and unnecessary considering that 99% of the time they could easily find fic without X if they want to. It sounds like these are the type of comments you've been seeing?

(I probably don't need to mention this, but obviously I'm assuming that X is a pairing or kink or narrative trope and not actually something where liking or not liking it is politically charged. Like, oh: "I don't like stories with any Asian or gay characters but the rest of your story was great despite it!" is guaranteed to be pretty inherently suspicious and offensive no matter what.)

[edenfalling]

If we're just talking ships, kinks, narrative tropes, then yes, I have gotten some of the more positive "and now you have introduced me to wonderful new things!" type of "I didn't like X, BUT" comment, or even just the friendly YKINMK type. They can be pretty nice to read. :-)

However, the particular review that led to this poll read, as follows:

It's old. It's odd. It's short. And I am homophobic. But still, it's good for a laugh, and definitely WAFF-y. :) I like it.

...I was gobsmacked, frankly. It's one thing to say something along the lines of, "Slash is not my cup of tea, but I enjoyed the humor and WAFF-y aspects of this story," but to outright declare oneself a homophobe and then act as if liking a slash story despite that entitles one to a cookie is, um, well it made me feel as if I'd somehow been complicit in something icky.

The sad thing is that that review is noticeable less for the sentiment expressed than for the bluntness used to express it. Which is not to say I get "I think slash is icky, BUT" reviews all the time, but yeah, they're out there. And I have never gotten one of them that continued on to say that I'd changed the reviewer's mind, just that they'd liked the not-gay parts of the story. :-(

[wrabbit]

Yeah, that is gross :( I wouldn't even know how to respond to that.